voicing "my truth"

Satya. Truth.

How easy is it to speak your truth for you?

Notmycat often comes and joins me for a sing song too. Just as she does when I am distance reiki charging savasana.

I may talk a fair bit.  But often I find the real me difficult to come forward - probably why I am a sarcastic old mare much of the time.

There is a lot going on in most of us.  Feelings we can’t/ won’t express.  Can we begin to find a truthfulness and way to express that feels okay?  

I distinctly remember when I was younger being told I couldn’t sing - thanks bro.  And slowly I stopped.  As usually happens to kids.  

To this day I carry that with me.  Perfectly normal to IMO.  But I also hold back on singing.  My truth.  My voice.

And the issue with all this is that the voice is such a powerful tool to heal ourselves.  Our tones are the vibration that our body needs.

Getting into that awkwardness and feeling my way with it all at the moment.  Solo chanting in the loft when school drop offs and pick ups are happening.  Still private.  Still just for me.  But slowly I am getting more comfortable with the sound of my voice as I hum, chant and sing.  

I am calling this in to find my voice.  Getting really fucking uncomfortable in order to find that comfort.  The resistance IS the path.  And it is illuminating the way so brightly at the moment.

Ways I am supporting myself along this path (I know loads of us struggle with this so thought it useful)

• Taking my time.  There is no “goal” with this - it is a kind exploration from devotion rather than discipline.  

• Keeping my practice to me and for until I genuinely feel ready to open it up to others.  Checking in with the weird sensations that come up and working with them, against with kindness in the way I feel into them.  Some days my body is really open to this, others I feel I am leaning into something solid and immovable.  This is not about to be shared with anybody in a public practice…. There is so much integration to do.

• Crystals - I wear a lapis lazuli around my neck  - I find at different points I am drawn to working with different crystals - some keep rotating, others come in for a while and then do their job and disappear.  Any how, Lapiz Lazuli is said to support speaking your truth, which is exactly what I feel I trying to get comfortable with as I chant and sing.

Check her out!

Where is this going to go?  I have no idea.. but I am enjoying the journey. Even if the neighbours aren’t!